Celeb Juicy Gozzip Update: KStew/RPatz vs. MiCy/Leeum

Most. Awk. Ppl. Ever.

This needs to be seacrest out…

One is dunzo, one is back ON. You be the judge…

Right or wrong?

KStew & RPatz are mercifully calling it quits yet AGAIN — as sources I have out in the field as my trusty summa interns (apply within to be apart of this lovely & gentle #GASPNation) that confirm these allegations. They aint in a relaysh nomo, ‘ats a shame. Good riddance. Go away for the love of MOSES. You both seemed right for one another — what with the beautiful albino skin, terrible conversational skills whilst in public forums, frowns that would make even Chris Traeger shed tears of depression, and general disdain they both had for sunlight & other human interaction on a day 2 day basis. Wooooooooof, get ova yaselves, it’s finally that time to go the separate ways now that Twilight has finally closed up shop. You 2 may now follow that trend. A case like this has been solved, book ‘em Burt Macklin.

As for the other daring duo of a couple, they are now shifting gears back towards walking the heavens, plank: Miley Cyrus (ITS MILEYYYYYYYYYYYYYY) & Liam Hemsworth.

This is GASP worthy if you ever thought of one. This ish just got realllll. As in real stupid. 

Why the bologna are these peeps thinking this could have any sort of “smart” logic in aiming to getting hitched? Why oh whyyyy. This is the type of news that will keep us up periodically throughout the night, imploring our brains to tell us the answer to this sick riddle of life. In the meantime, all we here at GossipAndSports can do is take our most educated guess as to this malarkey. Pure silliness.

Y’all have serious trust issues. Miley and Liam ADMITTED this, that they enjoy/get the most out of their relationship when they can push each others buttons…oh, right, because that’s the ticket to a happy/healthy future. Umm hmmm. I must have missed that in the dating handbook I suppose, ouchtown: population ME sheesh.

On top of the lack of trust they also constantly fight and apparently no one is telling Ms. Miley that she’s WICKED young and should be out there being a wing-woman to either the likes to TayTay or Selena. Be a normal nickelodeon star: go cray, say you’re “finding yourself”, take selfies on Insta, gossip all the time about potench boys, and read this site every day like what EVERYONE ELSE DOES!

Miley break free, K Stew you’re stinky…

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